


Sex fail

by syredronning



Series: bridge2sickbay [29]
Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Gay Sex, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-24
Updated: 2019-11-24
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:40:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21544675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/syredronning/pseuds/syredronning
Summary: "I can't believe you did that," Jim says from his seat on the toilet, legs spread and elbows on his knees, his laughter a little painful.
Relationships: James T. Kirk/Leonard "Bones" McCoy
Series: bridge2sickbay [29]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1542673
Comments: 1
Kudos: 43





	Sex fail

**Author's Note:**

> Challenge drabble written for bridge2sickbay in 2009, rescued from Livejournal. All errors are mine.
> 
> The theme was "Soap is NOT a lube".

"I can't believe you did that," Jim says from his seat on the toilet, legs spread and elbows on his knees, his laughter a little painful. "Aren't you the guy with the safer sex lesson? I'm sure I remember the line -"

"Goddamn, Jim," McCoy says, face flushed red.

"- SOAP – in very big letters, you said – SOAP is not a lube."

McCoy groans. "Yeah, I know what I said."

"So why do I sit here and shit my heart out?"

"Because I used shower gel and yes, I'm terribly sorry. Who could've known you'd react so badly to the ingredients."

Jim shakes his head incredulously.

"It's been an emergency," McCoy flusters.

Jim barks a laugh. "You mean, you had to fuck me or die?"

"Well – yeah. Something like that."

"That's a really good story." Jim shakes his head.

McCoy angles for the comm. "Guess we should get you beamed up, it's already going on for half an hour. Eh, Jim – maybe you could keep quiet about the exact reason for your problem."

Jim stares up at him, torn between amusement and indignation. "I'm not going to tell them I put it into my ass myself, and there won't be any stories of me accidentally slipping on the wet bathroom floor and landing on a bottle of shower gel either."

"Jim…" McCoy looks pleadingly.

"Alright, maybe we could just say that the description on the bottle was misleading," Jim relents, then coils forward with a heartfelt groan, followed by some unambiguous sounds. "Hell, you owe me one for that, Bones."

"I know, Jim. I know."


End file.
